Cussing is the language of men. I’m not talking about people who use swear words as filler because they don’t know what else to say. I’m not talking about the indiscriminate f-bomber either. Cussing has a definite set of purposes in the world of a man. Do you know what they are?
My favorite example is Gunnery SGT Hartman in “Full Metal Jacket”.
Cussing is a communications tool that is very effective with other men. In the video above, SGT Hartman is taking raw recruits and doing several things by cussing them out. First, he is establishing the gravity of the situation by putting the recruits in fear. He is specifically putting them in fear of him, so essentially he is establishing the male pecking order. This is something you find in any male group dynamic where a hierarchy starts to form from the alpha leader on down. Cussing, teasing, challenging is a natural part of that.
Cussing is a sledgehammer for driving points home. Basic training is all about breaking the teenage recruits down and then building them back up into killers, or at least into a group that will follow orders under the most extreme conditions. Cussing each other out in a light hearted way is also a means of building camaraderie with other men. Cussing is a communication tool for men, but not so much for women, and I’ll get to that shortly.
A time, a place, a purpose.
We’ve all done it to blow off some anger and frustration, but swearing really needs to be looked at as a tool. If you use it too much it becomes dull on the ear of the recipient. “The fucking beer was fucking warm and in a fucking dirty mug, for fucks sake”. If used all the time for everyday conversation cussing is worthless and annoying. People get used to hearing it, and will tune you out. The time to use it is when you are trying to make an important point, or establish your authority in a group of men, or go up against someone who is challenging your authority.
Let’s talk about places. There are places where it is not best to pull out the salty talk. Around small children for instance. I think you can start to ease it in occasionally with teenagers. I’ll give you a personal example. My dad was a platoon Sargent in the Army. His style of talk around us kids was not typically full of cuss words. Those only came out when he was angry about something or had injured himself. The worst I ever got was as a young man, when I had particularly disappointed him by letting a student loan go into default that he had cosigned on. His exact words were, “you’ve really torn me a second asshole here. What the fuck are you doing?”. That made an impression on me.
Let’s talk about another place. It’s Sunday morning at the end of church and you’re going through the line to shake hands with the preacher and say, “Damn preacher, that was a mighty fine sermon. That lake of fire talk just about made me shit my britches. Yes sir, gives a man something to think on”. Truthful, but not the best place or time. Now you churchians will protest that the Bible says you shouldn’t swear or take the Lord’s name in vain. That use of swearing is always in the context of an oath. Just like a witness is sworn in a court. Taking the Lord’s name in vain, simply means swearing an oath to God or before God under false pretenses. There are places and settings where cussing is out of place. Common sense will often tell you where those times and places are, but here are some examples; when small children are present, when speaking before authorities you are not challenging out of deference to their authority.
The verbal shiv.
It’s a true art form when you can verbally demolish an opponent without resorting to cussing. Not everyone can do it, and it’s not always effective if the target or audience doesn’t understand half of what you said. Part of the rhetorical attack is emotion based, not logic based. It’s about ridicule and mockery to make that person small in the eyes of others. It’s purpose is to undermine the targets authority without really addressing the facts around it. Vox Day is an example of a cruelty artist who wields his flaming rhetorical sword well.
Women who cuss frequently will come across as less attractive even if they are a physical 10. Why is that? I believe some women pick up cussing to fit in with the guys, or worse to flat out challenge men. This is part of the feminist imperative. Some women who cuss a lot are just plain crude and obnoxious. Double standard? Men can do this but not be crude and obnoxious, but women can’t. Ah, grasshopper, men are not women, and women are not men. There is no equality when there is no sameness. The group dynamics for women are vastly different from men. Women are wonderful, but they are not men. A woman who acts like a man is not attractive to most men.
Then there are the dregs, the tatted up women of Wal-Mart. Women who are the end results of generations of feminist brainwashing and poor upbringing. They were raised that way and know nothing different.